Please everyone, stop telling me how busy you are. How the holidays are always so crazy with parties and family. You know what I have going on for the next three weeks? Nothing. zero.

All my friends are married and are doing nine million family things or things with their school or whatever. My family is Jewish. We don't do anything and my sister and brother are married to non-Jews, so they're traveling for XMAS.

I just want some damn friends man. Friends who aren't obsessed with some guy. Friends who actually think to call and invite me once in a while.

I will now go eat my feelings in Oreos.